Divorce to Dating

Helping Divorced Singles Date

Archive for the Single Parents

What Single Parents Need To Know Before Starting To Date Again

Single parents don’t need to be single forever. Many parents get so caught up with protecting their children that they don’t know where to start in the dating world. It’s possible to keep your kids happy and healthy and still allow yourself to find companionship.

Finding Open Matches

Before you can start dating you need to find people who either have children, or are at least open to the challenges that children can present. Finding someone that is spontaneous and carefree can be a lot of fun, but it may not work if you have kids. You have to plan for sitters or plan daytime dates while the kids are in school, and there isn’t a lot of room for spontaneity. You can still have fun without losing that edge though if you able to find someone that will understand this.

Where to Meet People

There are many websites out there for single parents. You can find dating sites that target your demographic area. This makes it easy to find people to date because it’s already assumed that you have kids. Forums for single mums and dads are another good place to meet others and form lasting connections. In forums you can share experiences, discuss matters that are common among single parents, and post ads to meet other singles. You can also find speed dating services and mixers just for single parents. These are usually put together by churches, groups, and sometimes forums and dating sites will get together to organize these.

How You’re Children Will Deal with You Dating

Dating when you have kids can be tricky. Kids tend to become pretty invested emotionally very fast. If you start introducing younger children to your dates and it doesn’t work out, the kids can go through a grieving process. Older children may not respond well and want to revolt against the idea of you dating, so they need to be approached with caution as well. If you have kids, here are some great tips.

When to Tell Them

Younger children should be kept in the dark about your dating for as long as possible. Children younger than teens tend to form attachments very quickly, and if they meet a date and see them a few times they will start to gravitate towards them. If the relationship doesn’t work out they can be devastated and it can be harder on them than it is for you. A teenager on the other hand should be dealt with differently. If you keep them in the dark they will see it as you lying and sneaking around. You shouldn’t give them details, but its okay to let them know you are dating again. This gives them time to process it before you introduce them to someone you’ve become serious with.

When to Introduce Them

Regardless of the age of your kids, you should wait to introduce them until you know the relationship is serious. This will prevent them from getting attached to someone who may not be around, and for older kids it helps to let them know that you are serious. It gives them the opportunity to work through the issues they may have without mucking up the dynamic.